12/18/08

OK Christmas Knitting is Done and thoughts on Death and Dying


Really can't talk about the last two items I just completed knitting, but they are adorable!!

I made a promise to myself that I wouldn't do last minute gifts in my knitting, because I don't like extra pressure around the holidays. So Christmas is one week away and I QUIT!!

I know everyone dies, but when someone is sick and dying of anything but old age, it's always hard to take. I also know many people who have survived the loss of a loved one, that's why I know we'll be fine, my sister will be fine, their kids and grandkids will be fine, but ...

My brother-in-law has now been told that he may have 2 months to live, and in surgery the other day they didn't do the procedure they planned to do because the cancer has spread to many locations. We're hoping he and my sister can celebrate their 43rd anniversary the day after Christmas. They've had an amazing marriage. They set a high standard for all of us who are watching.

I really struggle with how to deal with this upcoming loss. My mind wants to hang on to hope that a miracle will happen, while my gut tells me to get myself ready for a loss. I hate the battle between my mind and gut. I know life goes on, I know God is sufficient His grace and comfort will carry my sister, she loves the Lord and trusts Him, it's just that the day-to-day pain of loss is slamming her.

Today I just stay busy with packing my office, knitting supplies, and the hubby's tools into the camper for our journey West after the holidays. We're so blessed to be two people who can rearrange our schedule when we're needed in another part of the country.

Even though we know a loss is coming, we also are preparing for a wonderful holiday with our kids and grandkids. What a joy they bring to our lives, and we cherish every second.

My brother-in-law, Norman, has a little 3 year old granddaughter who thinks the Sun rises and sets in Norman, her little mommy is very worried about how Noelle will react to the loss ... she is so precious and just hooked on Norman. We all get through these things, but surely do not choose them as a part of OUR plan for OUR future. God has a bigger picture to fulfill.

Sorry, if this is rambling or uninformative, but it's what is on my heavy heart today.

Gotta go see if the ice is off of the drive-way so we can go get a few more g-kid Christmas gifts...gotta get stuff under the tree!!

1 comment:

Gingerbread said...

You sound like a warm and loving family and you know that is what will keep you strong. Best wishes Julie

You can buy this poster.